#1 – Unseat the King of Filth
#2 – Disband the Council of 18 Jerks and install a jerk co-op in its place
#3 – Turn around AT LEAST 360 degrees
#4 – Haul the Triumvirate of Bird Poets into the street and pelt them with damp feathers until they admit there’s not even three of them
#5 – Tear down the entire system that says that a year will ever end, so we never have to do this again